~sUcKy sAtUrDaY~

Make a guess where I am at 3.30pm on a cloudy and windy saturday? At my workplace... -_- I'm not supposed to be here at tis time, but all cuz of my good darling.. SInce I hv no place to go and have to meet Beryl and the rest 6pm at marsiling to attend Weizhen's bdae, i might as well stay and finish up all my work... well, cant say all, cuz can never possibly fin everything. Super boring.. Cannot imagine why my life has become so sucky.. all work and nothing else.. no more fun. Supposed to go get my blades today... but... #$%^&* forget it.. I dunwan blades anymore. Very demoralized liao.. =( Saturday lehz!!! Cannot imagine workin on a saturday afternoon manz! super terrible mood now. *sobz sobz*

ANyway, went to coffeeclub beside california with Regina and Rita yesterdae... Tried their Fruit and Chocolate Fondue.. YuckS! Cannot make it.. cannot be compared to the other shop(I forgot the name wor) at esplanade.. The choco is not nice at all, not rich and the layout is so ugly too... disappointed... Tried their HoeGarden too.. Hmz.. the aftertaste is not as sweet as and the smell is not as nice as compared to the ones at Indochine.. Hmz.. maybe alcohol shound be taken at a pub instead of a coffeeclub ba.. then will you have that kinda kick and satisfaction..

Haiz.z.. itz 3.40pm liao... am still feeling so down.. sucky sat! =(

~bAcK wItH aN eNtRy oN a LoW mOrAlE dAy~

Ok, I know... no updates for a very long while.. Been kinda busy and tired with work since I came back from Bangkok. Wanted so much to update my Bangkok trip too, but think I'll just post some photos up and the end.

What started as a pleasant day end as a super sianz day today. Wonder, do friends really stay friends forever. I mean, yeah, friends do have their ups and downs. Friends go through all things good and bad. They survived the friendship and that's why in the end they remained best of friends..

Is it me? Or is it her? Juz not as we used to be.. itz like there's an invisible barrier between us.. the Feelings are just wierd. And especially the incident that happen today.. Izzit cuz I'm with him and may go along to the KTV session that's why she choose not to ans the call? Am I being over-sensitive?

Treasure your family, your loved ones. Friends are many, but they won't be there with you forever. Friends just seem to disappear with time. As you enter the workin society, time for yourself and friends get lesser... haiz... emo...

~bOn vOyAgE tO aLl tRaVelLinG~

Have to say sorry to Dechao.. Msged him this morning to meet for dinner cuz I'm leaving for hols tmr and haben seen him for quite sometime.. but cuz Cyrus jio me for dinner and I'm also very hungry liao, hence.... You know.. "Aeroplane flying" Had dinner with Cyrus at Newton circles. Stingray, kai lan, chicken wings and of cuz not fogetting my fav coconut drink. hehe.. He has a gf again... and with some probs too.. His gf is like 2-timing him..In my mind I was thinking, well, kinda familiar scenario.. but of cuz I kept it in my heart.. Alwis have so many things that I wanna confront him with but juz cant bring myself to ask..

In less den 24hrs, I'll be both on my way and at Bangkok.. GOnna leave at 10+am tmr to change Baht and meeting Ron and Xiao Hou ard 1130 at woodlands custom.. Our flight is actually at 6pm lor.. but as itz Deepavali tomorrow and due to the long weekend, there's a high possibility of causeway being super jam.. so we've decided.. rather be too early den miss our flight...

Have to go pack my bag now.. Feeling damn tired.. Let's hope I'm gonna have great buys at Bangkok and pray for us ya. haha.. Bon voyage to Liping, Yucheng, Ph, Xiang and Lixia. They're leaving for KL tomorrow.. Enjoy urselves too guys~ ^_^

~rOtTiNg dAY~

After such a late night yesterday, I slept till 4pm!!! Nua at Dear's place seeing him playing the Takeshi game and dozing off occasiaonally for a few mins.. He called me a pig.. =(

Dear got to book in at 8pm today, so I went PAsar Malam with Xiang. Had Strawberry Snowice and bought 2 BIG packets of tidbits home!! haha!! This is what a pig does rite? SLEEP AND EAT!!

After bidding farewell to Clubmed, I'm saying hello to Shunji Matsuo tmr morn..

zzz.. I wanna slp liao.. Goodnitez..


Saturday, November 06, 2004

~hApPy 21st bIrThDaY tO bErYl~

Went to SIR @ Lavender this morning, Dear to renew his passport and Me to change photo.. the photo inside was taken when I was in primary school lor. haha!! There's a super long queue!!! Guess itz coz the secondary school kids are there to make their IC. Saw Yiming on the train.. ahha!! STupid him, say at 1st nv saw mw cuz he was standing straight and I dun happen to fall within his view.. meaning to say I Am SHORT!!!! But I am lar.. haha!! staanding at a pathetic 157cm onli.. *sobz sobz*

Reached Beryl's place around 7+ for her 21st bday celebration.. Time really flies.. she's onli 17 when I first know her and today, she's really dressed like a princess.. pretty in pink. ^_^ Her friends had games planned in advance too.. haha.. So wu xim.. Ber kena sabohed by all of us to have a romantic dance with Ah Da wor~ But itz sooo nice wad.. hehe.. Was lookin at the Video Clip on my pc juz now.. Minus the talking of everyone and plus if there's someone to teach the dance steps, it'll be fantastic.. so romantic.. hehe!!


Group Photo taken with our Pretty Princess in pink DRESS (Can I be considered pretty too? I am also in pink lehz~ wahahah!! =p)

Left Ber's house ard 1+? Or was it 2+? Anyway, went to Hillview Mansion after departing from her place.. Da's the only one who knows the way so Xiang and Kenneth follow his car. though Da led us turing at every corner to a dead end(Cuz he forgot exactly the route liao. ahah!) , we found the place in the end. the brave 6 (Da, DJ, Xiang, Jeryl, Yucheng and Yiming) went up the long and steepy slope to the mansion.. Actally huh, Liping and I follow behind too but stop short and headed back after we saw a tree.. Well.. I juz kinda dun feel like continuing the the road is very very dark and I feel abit scared lar... But Liping saw something else, twice. She said she say someone sitting below the tree.. very unclear figure(you shd know what) Btw, Hillview mansion is rumoured to be a haunted house. Anyway, the guys said that the house is no longer there.. had been demolished... well.. 1 haunted place less in singapore.

Went NUS for prata after that.. hehe.. Had my fav Cheese prata as usual. After that is back home of cuz.. 1st time that Xiang dun hv to send anyone home(except me of cuz, haha!) cuz Da's sending all those stayin at west home. Poor Da.. Reached Dear's place ard 430am.. Dead beat manz...

Xiaohou managed to book flight to Bangkok on Deepavali.. So excited.. Looking forward to the shopping trip.. hehe..


Friday. November05, 2004

~lAsT dAy @ cLuBmEd~

The day has finally come for me to leave Clubmed.. Never thought that I am gonna stay an astonishing long 8 months temping at Clubmed.. Weiling booked me for lunch with some other colleaques today. Went DON @ Tangling Mall for lunch with Serene, Michelle, Adelene, Sor Leng, Weiling, Alvin, Roger and Benedict.. 1st time lunching with so many colleagues... ANyway, was soooo touched to receive farewell gifts from Michelle, Weiling, Adelene, Shelly and My Boss... Wanna say thanx and a big hug to them... Never expected them to give me anything lor... Went around taking pictures with other colleagues from other department after lunch.. and back to work again. haha! My last day and I had to stay till almost 7 to complete my work lor.. haiz..


Taken at DOn
Sitting (from left) : Serene, Michelle, Adelene, Sor Leng
Standing : Weiling, Me


Taken @ a corner @ Clubmed
1st Row : Benedict(Left) Roger(Right)
2nd Row(From Left) : Adelene, Me, Weiling
Last Row(From Left) : Sor Leng, Shelly, Michelle


This is from my boss Agnes but I really have no idea what they are.. Thought they are photo frame at first but having 2nd thoughts...

Went shopping with Ron at orchard after work... hmz... bought a top at Far East Plaza.. keep spending money on clothings recently.. Bought a top and skirt with Michelle they other day we went shopping and today, another top!!! OMG!! I muz try and control my spendings.. I am going broke!

Xiao HOu and Rizhi returned from their training at Australia tonight..

~Preparing myself for a busy nite~

What's with today's title? Well.. finally, the day has come, when I have to leave CLubmed... TOmorrow!! gonna be photo-taking session tmr. hehe.. Got some gifts for my Ex Tours and Traffic Boss Agnes, and my colleagues.


Stationary holder for my boss. Cute eh?


2 mirrors.. Snoopy and Betty Boob.. for Weiling and Sor Leng.


This, is for my Dear Michelle! hehe.. SHe love marshmallow.. the brand of the marshmallow is Campfire cuz Michelle dun like the fruit flavor ones.

Well.. as what the title says.. gonna be busy for the nite cuz I need to wrap the presents!! ja ne~

~eMo~

1250am and here I am still, sitting in front of my pc and blogging? OMG! Gonna die a horrible terrible death tmr.. Reason as to why I am still awake??

• Tidying my room cuz itz too dusty and untidy and my hair is wet...
  
• My hair is wet cuz I had a late bathe today and though my hair is shorter and lesser now, it still need HOURS to dry...
• Had a late bathe cuz I came home late...
• Came home late coz I went DFS(bought biotherm foundation with 25%discount wor~ thanx to dear michelle. ^_^) and after that far east with Michelle to get gifts for my colleagues...
• Had to get gifts for my colleagues cuz itz my last day of work on Fri. Kinda sad... gonna miss some colleagues and definitely, Michelle.

Talking about my dear Michelle, I really have to thank her. She brought fun and life into my stay at Clubmed. WIthout her, I think I'll still be quite a loner there. If you are ever reading this, I will like to say thanx. Really appreciated your appearance into my life(OMG I sound so lesbian). Will definitely not forget you wor~ We'll still go blading and shopping ya. keke. We'll oso get to lunch together once a week wor~ Wellington building is not that far from STB lar hoh. hehe.

Feeling so lonely all of a sudden. Think itz the effect "night" have on me ba.. Realized that as you grow older, you tend to have less time for your friends, even your close friends.. Deep in my heart I miss everyone in my life but no longer have the energy to constantly keep in contact anymore. I cant even go out after work once a week w/o feeling tired and all energy drained from me. What's worse? I'm onli 22!!! Haben spoken to Dear for 2 days. Haiz.. as what SHijie said "WHat kinda Officer is he?? Other officers so slack yet he's so buzy" Blame it on his f***ing battalion then. Leaving him no time at all. Poor thing. Whoever said officer very relac uh? MIssing Dearie alot lehz.. haben had the chance to discuss about the Deepavali weekend trip. Bangkok? KL? or 1 nite stay in SG Hotel?

Dechao oso never msg me for 2 days liao. hmz.. GUess I know why. Am I being too sensitive?? But never forget, a woman's intuition is alwis right! Why am I blogging out all my thought? Guess itz wad the title suggest...

~cOmPlAiNt fRom s0mEoNe w0r~

here I come~! Read Mei's blog.. hmz.. someone complaining huh.. say I nv blog... no stories to read.. aiyo.. tired mahz.. hehe.. anyway.. here goes~!~!~!~

I went Loreal Sales with Michelle last Fri lehz!! There are Maybelline and Garnier too... But for Loreal, they only have cosmetics and hairdye.. no hair and face products. so sadz... anyway.. their cosmetics are really damn cheap lor!! Can mix and match, 4 for only $12!!! Bought 2 Loreal waterproof mascare(1 for ROn), 1 maybelline transparent lip gloss and nail hardener and 3 eyeshadows! hehe.. Really a great bargain lehz.. Anyway, itz really crowded and squeezy... imagine so many woman crowding together to snatch up watever good stuff there is.. 1 even stepped on my fooT!!! but forgot it.. everyone is juz excited. hehe..

Watching Ren Wo Au You now.. they are having a diving trip.. though I'm scared of the sea cuz I dunno wad lurkes beneath, I hope to go diving 1 day.. been 1 of my dream to dive down into a clear blue, green ocean.. look at the corals and fish.. Michelle went snorkelling with baby sharks before wor.. hehe.. sound so scary, but like quite fun.. itz a different world beneath..

Intended to go Bangkok next weekend coz of the Deepavali and Hari Raya LOng Hols.. but damn terrorists.. spoil my trip. Everyone says tat itz too dangerous.. haiz.. HongKong is having a change of season from autumn to winter so even if go shopping there, the clothes will only be those more of a thicker kind.. not the kinda clothes that I want.. think the onli place left is only KL liao.. haiz... KL again.. really sianz lehz... Dunno 1 year muz go there how many times..

I wanna concentrate on watching my show liao.. hehe.. ja~

~bAcK~

haben been updating my blog for so long.. well.. not that nothing to update, but too tired to even come online. last week was my 1 week break from Clubmed.. well.. thought I could do with a week rest.. but as i mentioned, went to temp at Shunji Matsuo and back to CLubmed on monday. Well.. been complaining that I've been temping for very long.. As fate have it... they want me as their perm staff... as admin accounts.. Frankly, accounts have never ever crossed my mind cuz I never like to deal with figures. Anyway, it is a good start so y not go for it? At least itz a perm job with benefits and bonus and annual leave! haha! And free haircut too(I was told.. =p) will start work on 8 Nov.. hmz.. 118, meaning yat yat fat (correct spelling?? ) in cantonese.. good indication uh..

Anyway, got a free haircut at Shunji last week. One of The stylist need model for their training by the Director, hence I got chosen(cuz I got long hair, haha!) Following that I dyed my hair on sat. WEnt all the way down to Tampines to support the stylist who cut my hair leh.. So good.. haha!!! Very satisfied with my haircut and colour. ^_^ No chance to post it here cuz my digicam is currently with Fang.

Hmz.. currently reading Deception Point, Dan Brown again.. haha.. Avid reader of his books. *yawnz* very tired liao.. shall update next time when I am not so tired. hehe... All the best to all wor~ COngrats to Ninja... Ord soon..

~New Workin EnVir0nmeNt~

watching pearl harbour... dun really remember the whole story, but vaguely remember that 2 guys fell in love with the same ger.. the same nurse... and I remember the sad song of cuz.. haiz.. how come tv keep showing long and draggy and sad movie recently.. then was Titanic, now Pearl Harbour.. but have to admit, nice show lar.

1st day of work in a new environment today.. Shunji Matsuo Pte Ltd.. ITz a Japanese Hair salon.. I'm workin in their head office...keying in their invoices for the various branches.. at 1st was feeling quite blue... missed CLubmed, and most importantly, miss my dear auntie michelle.. whaaha!! She's gonna kill me if she sees this.. =p Anyway, this is onli a 1 week temp job. WIl be going back to CLubmed next mon but this time I'm helpin out the Training Department and not the Tours Department(which is why I'm having this 1 week break). Hopefully for the rest of this week I'll be doin OT.. to earn more $.. haiz.. still thought of having a rest this 1 week and look for a perm job... seems that I'm fated to do temp job sia.

Watched Ladykillers by Tom Hanks with Dearie on Saturday... ultra lame show.. totally not worth the 8.50. =( Back to Pearl Harbour. The Americans are bombing Japan now.. izzit Hiroshima? well. I've returned my history to my teachers right after sec 2. when there's a war going on, so many innocent civilians are killed... how can they bear it? haiz... whoever says love hurts? War hurts more..

~A fRd's c0ncErn is n0t 2b tReaTed |ikE sHiT (17/10/04)~

Went blading as usual, but the mood is not the same as usual. itz super sucky! the blades I rented sux.. changed another pair, sux as well! Nvm, I'll wait patiently till Nov, and I'll get my own blades. 2nd sucky thing that affect my mood, obviously, is frd. Sometimes I really wonder how i control myself from flaring up. As I said, when a friend ask you why you are unhappy, ask you if you are ok, it means they care, they are concern about you. Dun start showing attitude... and itz not juz any kinda normal attitude.. others also have feelings.. and very obviously, I feel hurt and pissed! Will never forget this incident..

~Movies~

hmz.. haben been blogging for quite some time... not that nothing to blog, but tired and lazy to blog lehz... I went to Dechao's Grandma's wake last Tuesday.. at Jurong... and I was reading Da's blog and realise that he too went to someone's wake last week.. haha.. at west side too lor.. such a coincidence..

Watched movies 3 days consecutively last Friday, Saturday and SUnday.. haha.. Power lehz! Hmz.. Sex is Zero on Friday nite with Ron and ALex and of cuz my Dearie.. Realized that the few movies I've been watchin lately are all comedies.. Dodgeball, Whitechicks and now there's Sex is Zero.. As what Ron said.. Many big breasts in the show lor.. haha!! Very suitable for Shijie lehz.. =x Anyway... Watched Wimbledon on Saturday with Dearie and his campmates.. the 1st time i go out with his friends... Anyway, dun really find Wimbledon very fantastic.. Mayb due to too much super hilarious comedies, hence feel that there's not much high climax in WImbledon.. juz 2 tennis players falling in love and the most important tennis matched to be played and bla bla bla~ The last movie will be One Miss Call... Caught this show with Dechao at CWP at nite.. someone told me that itz a very scary show.. well.. I have to say, quite disappointing...itz scary.. bt not really super scary lor. Anyway, this show is about this Missed Call by your own hp no. that you will recv and when you listen to ur voice messages, you'll actually hear the last words or sentence that you said before your death. Kinda eerie uh.. hmz.. the plot is abit blur too..

~Ting's HoUsE wArMiNg (10 Oct 04)~

Went to Ting's house warming after blading... had to rushed down carrying a super big and heavy oven toaster for her.. Luckily got Dechao.. sent me down.. hehe.. hugz Anyway, few pictures taken in Ting's room.. due to too many people outside, we keep stayin in the room, hence onli pics of her room. haha!!

Fang, Xiaoli & Ger GEr... well, YOu can ignore the notty face between Fang and Xiaoli.. he's a super nuisance.. wanna take proper pics but he keep popping in between... tell him nicely to go away oso dunwan...I know he's juz a kid, but still, I'm super pissed off with him. Not only me lor.. Fang ah, Xiaoli and Alex oso feel the same way lor.


That's Alex, Me and Ger ger... hmz.. Look like 1 family? Alex's happy till see mouth cant see eyes.. haha.. Nah.. Not a couple and not our baby~ My god daughter though.. hehe. Ger Ger really look alot like Ting..


Yeah... This is the couple... haha.. Ron and Alex.. Do they have the couple look? I think they do.. hehe..

~Belle n Beau~

Finally, been waiting for this day, wanna see Jos on TV.. COme home early juz to support him lor. Hehe. As I mentioned before, Jos's appearing in School Belle and Beau.. hehe.. One of the Beau lar. Kinda wierd to see a frd on tv.. hehe.. I m supporting him of cuz. Really admire his courage in admiting on tv that he nominate himself.. for fun. haha! Anyway, wish him all the most, though he said he wun win, cuz the other contestant is a model. Yueyang's frd.. hehe.. Wow!! G2, Kel.. very very tall!!! Shiok sia! Find her very pretty too.. hehe..

Dechao's grandma passed away yesterday.. His gradma is not really old, onli ard 70+, but passed away coz of illness... Maybe going down to her wake tmr... Still waiting for sharon to reply me.. Met up with Eddy, Mark, Jaycen, Ron, Ariel and Jere for Kbox session at cine yesterday.. Haben seen them(except for Ron lar, see her almost every alternate days.. like a couple like tt.. haha!) for very long.. well.. everyone's the same.. and Yunmei seems to be very blissfully in love. ^_^ Their relastionship's Still going good..Hehe.. As usual, nothing much to blog on weekdays... Shall go back to watching tv..

~mY wEeKeNd~

On friday, i was thinking as I was workin... "Yeah! Itz Friday, last day of the week, start of the weekend.. Gonna have rest and fun and outta the draggiest and most dreaded Mon-Fri.." but think fun really make the day passby so fast.. Now I'm sitting in front of my computer and thinkin.. "Shucks.. Itz Sunday nite again and back to work tmr.." I dun expect much.. be good enough if weekdays are sun and sat while weekends are Mon-Fri.. wahahah~!!!

FriDay : After 9hrs in the office... FInally get to relax! Met Ah Ron at JP and took a cab to Boon Lay Shopping Centre... ROn wanted to book ferry tix to Bintan for sat, but as itz too last min, no tix were available.. aw... so sad for Ron & Hou.. But cheer up~ cuz there's alwis next time.. No lack of chances.. After that, Da fetch us to Shijie's Aunt's hse at 12+am... Played only one "east" of majong and Dear Mr Shijie and Ms Ron's tummy were growling at us so we had to stop the game and go for supper.. That marked the end of our majong session. Shijie brought 1 bottle of Vodka, Tequila and BAiley's over, hence we took the chance to Invented some new cocktail after supper.. Strawberry Yoghurt Drink was our fav mixer. hehe...

SaTurDay : Slept from 2-4pm... Met Dear at 5pm.. Supposed to meet Yunmei and Beau for White Chicks but coz I overslept, failed to get the 730 tix.. so Dearie and I meet Ron and HOu instead.. caught the 930 White Chicks.. haha.. SUper Hilarious.. everyone in the Cinema is laffing hard... Itz really a nice show... Will give it 4**** ^_^ I love it betta when the 2 FBI agents were Tiffany and Britney though.. hehe..

SunDay : Went blading at ECP again. hehe. Lousy me alwis feared the 1st step after wearing the blades... Lack the courage to stand up by myself. Reason why there's noone there to help is becoz.. Fang, ChingChing, Michelle and her friend are all wearing their personal blade and as my blade shop do not the a path, hv to walk on the stones, they cant come over, for fear of spoiling their blades. haiz.. Last Resort... Dialled Dechao's no.. hehe.. Luckily he's at ECP too~!~!~!~ My hero of the daY! ahhaha.. He's the best lor... willing to sacrifice his blades... hehe.. Halfway to Fort Road and it rained... All of us had to blade for shelter... I think someone had forgotten that he's pulling me lor, so when he made a sudden turn into a small path, I fell hard on my bum.. Weixian tried to break my fall but too late... haiz.. Grew a rose on my butt... Thanx ya Dechao.. 1st time I fell when blading lor. haha!! The sun finally won the battle against the rain after about 20 mins.. Fang, ChingChing, Dechao, Weixian, Qiqi and I continued blading.. Destination, Bedok Jetty. Covered quite a distance today.. some of the paths were some challenging lor.. cracked roads, upslope, downslope. Poor Fang grew 4 roses today.. 1st time too.. Rained again on our way back so no choice, all blading have to stop. stupid weather...

Hmz.. Guess I'm quite satisfied with the way i spend my weekend this week. had a balance of dear and friends.. hehe.. Sad though, cuz no blading for next week. haiz.. have to wait for next next week....

~Da Vinci in Dan Brown~

I Can be seen clutching onto Dan Brown's novel 'The DaVinCi Code' everywhere I go for the past few days... THough the story is fictional, most of the facts inside is true. Dan Brown is truly a good author.. there're many unexpected twist in the story and suspense till the end.... You wun bear to put in down after reading the 1st chapter!! 'THe DaVinci Code' talk about religion (christian, catholic, pagan) and tell us about the hidden meaning behind DaVInci's paintings, such as The Last SUpper, The Mona Lisa(as do u Know why itz called the Mona Lisa Smile? There's a reason behind the smile), The Vitruvian Man..

Wah!! Let me side tracked for awhile.. Wah!! The contestants for today's School Beau and Belle huh.. super cannot make it lor! G1 look ok lar.. but G2, who happens to be the winner, is not pretty... as for the Beau.. he's quite handsome at 1st look.. but oncer he smile, I thought I saw a modern age Dracula.... I admit I like tiger tooth aka vampire tooth... But.... His really scare me off... Anyway, dun forget to keep a lookout for next week's episode..Joseph is one of the beau.. but of cuz, he'd already told me the outcome of the votes at NTU on wed.. hehe... ANyway, anyone watched Pi Li Huo? haha.. I know.. auntie show.. but quite nice.. I happened to watch 1 episode last week and I'm hooked on.. Find Wencong very handsome.. hehe..

Back to DaVinci..

Virgin of the rocks

Virgin of the Rocks. There are actually 2 versions of this great DaVinci's work.. Y? Read the book to find out. Hehe!! Quoted"Brown delivers a crackling, intricate mystery, complete with breathtaking escapes and several stunning surprises. It's challenging, exciting, and a whole lot more. The race across France and the United Kingdom leads us on a fascinating journey through a covert, enigmatic world revealed through a seemingly endless collection of codes, puzzles, anagrams, cryptograms, and messages hidden not only in Da Vinci's art but in things we think we know well" True... Brown speaks of many amazing and interesting fact in his book.. and most of them are juz besides us.. surrounding us..Juz that we either dunno, or never realise.. To find out more, read 'The DaVinci Code'. Anyway, only two words, EXTREMELY BEST!! For Christians though, they may find certain contents of this book offending due to certain things mentioned about Christ..

Anyway.. Next novel on the list is Digital Fortress, oso by Dan Brown. It's also on code breaking.. But at the moment Dearie is reading it now.. so I have to wait. hehe. Yeah!!

After a Sporty Day

Back to work on a Monday after having a very healthy but tiring SundaY~ Went Blading at ECP with Ron, Dechao, Weixian, Qiqi and a PRO Blader!!! We bladed from Mac to Fort Rd(SHd be spelt this way ba.. hehe) and then to Bedok Jetty then back to the ring again. Made me wanna own my own pair of blades even more.. I wan Salomon blades!!! hehe.. After blading, Ron and I went JE to meet our Dearies, XiaoHou and Jerry.. Reached JE swimming complex.. and Know wad?! ?~?~ Pissed manz! Went all the way there only to realise that the whole swimming complex had been booked by hyatt hotel.. Shucks! Mood all spoilt!! Nvm.. We then took a cab to Clementi Swimming Complex, but did not get to swim too. Cuz our Dear Good Old Xiaohou did not bring his swimming trunks. Might as well lar.. cuz my mood had already been dampened at JE, so whether Swimming or not doesn't make a diff anymore. Went for Badminton at 8pm.. hehe.. hmz.. Daz and Xiaohou are good players. Alex is a fast learner too. Heard that he only started badminton a few weeks ago but he can play quite well le.. sweat like dunno wad... hopefully I lose a few KGs..opz.. I forgot to weigh myself.. hehe...

Far end Left:Daz Far end Right:Alex Seah(In white)
Left:Dear Right:Alex(Xiaohou)
I noe the pics are blur.. but bo bianz. they were moving ard.. very difficult to capture clear 1.

Had a fulfilling weekend once again. Yeah!! Itz time to rest my aching body now. nitez. ^_^

Chinatown Trip

Went Marsiling Polyclinic early in the morn.. Dearie for the pain in his foot. As for me... same old sickening thing... my eye!! Dearie has flat foot thatz why the pain. Doc say there only cure is to exercise more!! -_-" Anyway, Dearie got excused for the Army Half Marathon on Sunday. Haha! He's one happy guy... As for me, Doc said I've got Allergy Conjunctivities, simply means I have sensitive eyes. Doc even explained, saying that itz the same as people having asthma, juz that in my case,itz the eyes. haha! He said itz not infection, bt Ron told me Conjunctivities means infection.. hmz.. Cheem Cheem.. Gave me a bottle of eyedrop bt have yet to use it. Doc says after using it cant wear lens for the 1st 3 days.. then since I have to go blading on sun, I decided against it at the moment.

Went Chinatown after that.. Had Gui Ling Gao at The Majestic.. hehe.. I love it, but not Dearie.. He said itz bitter and added sooooo much sugar syrup.. OMG!


Dearie eating the Gui Ling Gao..

Went in search of Da Tong Mooncake at Mosque Street. Dearie's mum like that Lao Zhao Pai so bo bianz.... Anyway, we went from lanes to lanes in search of Mosque street lor! It sounds very familiar.. but simply cant recall which lane it is... Called Ariel and after awhile of walking here and there (till I'm so super tired lor!) I realised that I once had a job interview at Mosque Street lor! Alamak! After that bought 2 pomelos, from Thailand and red flesh.. yet to try it.. hehe.. Hope itz sweet.. Went walkin around at Chinatown street.. I alwis thought they were only open before CHinese New Year.. hehe.. I'm wrong. The lantern festival mood is in the air.. ^_^

Endof Saturday, 25Sep

Ron & I Meeting up with Jianliang & Mingting

Met up with Mingting, Jianliang and Ron at IMM.. Hmz.. been years since I last saw Mingting.. Guess that all of us never change much over the years. Well.. alwis see Jianliang in SP last time so he still look pratically the same. Time really flies.. we've all grown up.. they were so notty and mischievous in Pri sch.. I still remember how Jianliang used to tease me about the "Darkwing Duck" ahha! *shhh.. secret.. Anyway, had a nice chat with these two guys.. they are.. erm.. quite lame too.. wahahaha!! Went Noodle Hut for dinner and after that, Secret Recipe for some coffee and cakes.. THe marble cheescake there is really nice lor.... not coz of the cheese.. itz coz of the base! Oats Crust Base!! hehe.. Yummy.. well.. I love oats lar... ^_^ Anyway, only managed 1 group photo... so sadz..


hmz.. shd be obvious uh.. ttz me and ron(the bai zhan ji). next to ron is Jianliang followed by Mingting.. 1 of them is a police wor.. able to Guess??

Endof Friday, 24Sep

~Titanic on Tv~

was switching the channels here and there and saw Titanic on channel 5... The movie few yrs back that flooded many cinemas with tears, the movie that left many leaving the theatre with tears-streaked face.. the ship juz brushed against the iceberg!!! alamak!! Tragedy is striking.. hmz.. but nope, dun think I'm gonna watch till the end of the show. . too sad.. my heart still cant take it. . Oh, itz, juz part 1 today. wooo... The Titanic is such a big big, hmz.. wad do you call that? Ship? Boat? Sometimes i wonder.. though Titanic is juz a movie, maybe there is really a true, touching story going on in the ship when it sank... oh.. show eneded.. to be continued... haiz... really tempted to watch.. Part 2 is at 10.. Heh.. think I'll watch.. but i believe I wun end up with a teary face this time..

Nothing much to update recently, cuz been doing nothing but coming home after work and sleeping.. oh, got my Levi's 593 finally! hehe. got it during the weekend.. got it in my size, my length, and my colouR! haha.. Very surprised that I can squeeze into size 24.. thought I'll be wearing 25. haha! I did the MOST piggy thing last sun! Let me update..

I slept at 4+am on sun morn after returning from the movie Dodgeball at 2+am... Met Cyrus at my blk void deck. Itz his bdae, and I'm meeting him to.... listen to his probs. haha! Slept all the way from 4+am till 530pm... and slept at 930pm again all the way till mon morn 7am(to go work, if not I'll be still sleepin. haha!) wonder what's the prob with me... seems that I need more and more sleep as I got older.. thought this shdn't be the case? haha! but think itz a fortune to be able to sleep lar. hehe... Guess that's all ba.. nothing else liao.. cuz(as I mentioned) been coming home straight after work everydaY since....

~hOmE f0r e 3Rd c0nSeCtiVe dAy~

Good ger 2dae... came straight home after work.. hmz.. itz the 3rd day consecutively.... Feel so happy, cuz I have more time to myself and my room.. and feel less tired.. ^_^ Got a surprise 2dae.. Joseph called me wor~Been ages since he last called me... Well, guess when you're attached, you cant have too much contact with the opposite gender.. buthen.. it depends too lar... depends on who ur other part is.. hehe... ANyway, chatted for quite long... told me abt him and his gf's probs.. hehe.. but what's most shockin is....... *dum dum dum dum~~~*
"Attention Everyone.. Please keep a close lookout for the wed after next, channel 8, 8pm, Belle and Beau"
Anyway, reason being, Joseph is one of the contestant running for Beau of NTU.. haha!! was really so surprised when he told me that... but anyway, I'm gonna vote for him!! He's definitely more handsome den the 2 guy contestants yesterday... and most importantly, "once a dar, alwis a dar.." hehe.. Guess I'm the only one who understand this sentence.

Hmz.. watch Singapore Idol today.. wildcard series.. ahha! Very disappointed in Haizad.. haiz.. His voice is so beautiful when I heard him sang at Cleo's Bachelor Final at ZOuk.. Y Is he soundin so different in Sg Idol?? =( Was really mesmerised by his voice that time lor.. Not only me..most of the gers there are..

Tomorrow is Friday.. heheh.. The day that I get to see Dear Dear... yEaH!

~hApPy tO sIaNz~

Was in an ok, normal, cheerful, happy, joyous and etc mood at 1st... till I received a call from the person, the 1 and only person who can totally change my mood from tip top heaven to the bottomless pit... yes.. "Heng"... haiz... Thought I could have a normal conversation with him.. after all, itz been nearly a yr. But it seems that itz still the same... He's still waiting.. Even though he's the 1 who asked about Dearie, he still nearly flare up, tryin hard to control his temper. What's worse? He's still having the strong feelin that I belong to him (NO I dont and I hate to!) and that someone snatched me away from him ( Oh Come ON!! No one snatched me from you lor.. you are the 1 who made this day happen) haiz.. suX!

Anyway, Surprise and surprise! Dearie's bro added me in his MSN list yesterday.. Haha! So cute... Sec 2 this yr,feels that he kinda resemble Dearie (alamak, of cuz, brothers lehz) Mai siao siao lor.. onli sec2 and his programming is betta den me. haha! Feel so paiseh sia~

Kena approached by a pru agent 2dae at woodlands MRT station again. hmz.. seems that they are everywhere... I was posting a letter when suddenly, he popped out..

As I've no means to write chinese character, please bear with the hanyu pinyin..
Pru : Xiao Jie, Ke Yi Zhuo Ge Survey mahz?
Me : Eh... Wo You Le.
Pru : (Giving a stunned and surprised look) HUH???
Me : I mean I've done this survery b4... Pru Cash rite? *smilez*

And I immediately walked off.. Haha! i feel so stupid! I meant to say I've already got a Pru Agent.. -_- Told YueYang about it and he keep calling me ShaGua lor! But so cute.. last week Weiliang called me Diao Man Gong Zhu, Yixiang Misa called me Princess, now Yueyang call me Shagua.. All are so cute nicks.. Eh, but of cuz I know I m not a GOng Zhu lar.. wahha! Juz kinda feel so cute. =p

hmz.. 2 entries for 1 day.. Not bad... Onli intended to blog abit, din expect that he will call me and in the end made me pour out my unhappiness... Feels so much betta now. ^_^ Wed now, 2 more days to weekend, 1 more day before I can see Dearie. hehe.

~fIsHeRmAn vIlLaGe (10Sep04)~

Hmz..guess this entry is kinda outdated..Anyway, went Fisherman VIllage with Xiaohou,Weiliang,Henry and Ah ron~ Reach there super late lor... reached there ard 2+am... It has a very nice ambience, but 1 thing bad is that they are playing 2 different genre of songs den itz like so confusing... cant really concentrate on 1 song.. were sitting there and chatting when suddenly.. it starts to drizzle.... then downpour. but we were already in the shelter wen its raining heavily.. hehe.. Were drinking and singing our hearts out.. It all started with a game and in the end... all of us were singing out all the old songs.. older then wad you can guess.. haha!


Hmz... this is supposed to be a group photo, but Henry seems so "out" (there's a couple amidst the group wor.. Guess shd be obvious uh.. ^_*)


The background should be the sea.. but itz kinda dark so all that can be seen is a pitch black blackground. Sitting beside Ron I feel like a Shao Ji(Roasted Chicken) while Ron is like a Bai Zhan Ji(White Chicken).. wahhaha!

MamBo @ ZoUk (08Sep04)

Went Zouk... Mambo Night.. my 1st time to Zouk for Mambo.... Retro all the way..Heard my Favourite song, Bizzare Love Triangle (Still remember that Jimmy is the 1 who intro me to this song.. Hmz.. Haben been in contact with him for very long.. guess we are all busy with our own stuff) and surprisingly, they play "I Dont Wanna Know" by Mario Winans and P.Daddy.. hehe All in all.. itz FUn, but the ppl there are so stupid.. dancing to the same dancesteps.. Ji siao WeiWEi when he's doing those "actions" wahahha!!Anyway, his dimple is very very attractive lor! wahah!! Dimple and Tiger tooth attract me(I Know I've said this umpteen times)!!! But too bad Dearie has neither.. By the time Weiliang sent me home itz 5am... -_- Super tiring.. somemore there's work the next day.. haiz.. Slept for only 2hrs lor...

~bOrEd~

Wakey at 12+, but Dearie is still pigging!! I m starving.... -_-"

Dearie: Dear dear hungry liao hoh?
Me : Yes
Dearie: But I cant wakey... (and he dropped dead on his bed again....)

Super bored... Seriously considering going to Daiso with Sharon lata.. Juz saw the post on FP about Daiso and the shop is like so interesting... But dunno if I should leave Dearie alone.. cuz he's bookin in lata le... haiz... *headache*

How to make a audrey

Ingredients: 3 parts success 5 parts arrogance 5 parts ego

Method: Add to a cocktail shaker and mix vigorously. Top it off with a sprinkle of curiosity and enjoy!

Username:

Personality cocktail
From Go-Quiz.com

~Saturday at Home..~

At Dearie's house now.. He's reading his US FHM on his bed and I'm blogging... Guys.. Love FHM so much.. Muz be the sexy bikini girls inside.. wahahaha!! Watched Windstruck juz now... Itz sooooo sadz.. The Story of the Pinkies... Itz very touching... Haiz.. If your loved 1 leave you suddenly, it'll be so hard to accept it. I too will wish that he'd accompany me for the 49 days before his spirit leaves forever... Cried my Eyes out... they are now looking like those of a Goldfish.. O_O I Sobbed LOUD and Dearie actually had the heart to laff at me... BAD!

Wakey at 7pm today (Cuz I slept at 6am this morn ok! ) oh gosh I'm really beginning to think if my behavior really resemble a pig's... I love to sleep alot and I love to eat... Luckily I'm not growing horizontally...

Anyway, very tired to blog.. Shall update about my Mambo night last wed and my 1st visit to Fisherman Village Yesterday (The reason Why I am home so late... -_-") some other days..

~Quiz~

Hmz.. saw this quiz at Daz blog.. find it quite interesting.. had a go at it, and this are the results

eXpressive: 8/10
Practical: 5/10
Physical: 4/10
Giver: 6/10

You are a XPIG--Expressive Practical Intellectual Giver.

This makes you a Catch.You are a magazine-cover, matinee idol dreamboat. Parents love you and want to set you up with their kids. However, first dates are tough because it takes time for your qualities to come out.

You are generous and kind. You think first and act later. You are cool in a conflict, but your practical side means if your partner throws out emotional appeals ("why can't we do what I want for a change?") they will grate on your nerves, even when the conflict is resolved.

You're a romantic. You enjoy the thrill of the hunt, and you don't just fall into bed with anyone. You pay close attention to your significant other's needs, and this makes you an excellent lover and partner. The problem is that your friends and lovers may find it so easy to express things to *you* that they lose sight of whether you feel as comfortable with *them*! This doesn't necessarily make you feel under-appreciated -- you're too well-adjusted and self-aware for that -- but you may feel restless. Thus you seek adventure in your life outside the relationship to prove and actualize yourself.

Of all the types, you would make the best parent.

You are coiffed. Didja see "Big Fish"? 'Cause you're like Ewan MacGregor in "Big Fish."

Of the 56722 people who have taken this quiz, 8.3 % are this type.

20 Questions to a Better Relationship

~enCoUnTeRs iN vEnIcE & rOmE~

Hmz.. Realized that I've no pics to post.. haiz.. to me, A blog without pictures are boring! Added a new link, My Ah Mei, ChingYi! ^_^ Anyway, on our way home after work 2dae, Michelle was telling me about wad happened to her friend in Venice and Rome.. Here goes...

Girl(G) and Boy(B) were on a sorta wedding package to Venice and Rome, phototaking with a few other couples. 1st destination was Venice.. G&B checked into a hotel room and when they were sleeping at night, they suddenly heard a loud *thum thum* sound. They could sense that something was amiss cuz, well.. you juz know it rite? Hence B took out his Bible and began saying out prayers. Never had a wink of good rest till morn. This is just the beginning..

Rome was their next destination. B saw this really nice hotel, (well, wad you would expect in Rome, really those ancient kinda hotel, very nice) and decided that they will reside there for their stay. Who knows that this nice, grand ancient-lookin hotel is actually worse den the previous... With them were 2 photographers(1 room) and their assistants(1 room). 1 of the assistants has this 3rd eye which can see spirits. When she stepped into her room with the other assistant, she was stunned... there were so many of "them" People like her have to keep quiet and pretend that they never see anyting and go about doing their stuff like normal, so she went for a bathe and guess wad... There were really soooo many of them.. As she started to bathe, all of them just "went" into the bathroom.. This was the 1st time she saw sooooo many spirits. She was being scare the hell outta her. She started reciting the prayers from the bible and the unexpected happened.. She was slapped!!!

She rushed outta the room with the other assistant to the reception counter. To her surprised, the receptionist actually knew that the room was dirty, but said that so far noone had been disturbed by "them". She was the one being slapped, of cuz she doesn't wana go back to the room, hence they were given another room. But once the person opened the door for her, she immediately said she doesn't want the room.. seems that there were also alot of spirits inside.. Since there were no available rooms, they shared a room with the photographers. Know what the spirits were wearing?? Victorian...

The End.. the above is true wor. itz not a story.. really makes mi cringe after hearing it.. eeeks! ANyway, Osmose is having this "Pay by nets and get 20% off" sales. Only at the Wisma branch.. till 19sept. Hehe.. Michelle got a shirt lor.. Am soooo tempted.. Will Go see see after I get my pay.

Hmz.. My eyes are giving me problem.. feelin itchy, sore and rash.. old ailment.. sux! anyway, shall knit now. Have to finish casting for Michelle to start her knitting.

~Jianzhong~

Waiting for Dearie to Finish playing his game before goin for lunch... Am so damn hungry liao and he'd not called me yet! So decided to do a short blog.. Chatting with Jianzhong in Msn now.. haiz.. he's 1 good friend whom I dun really get to keep in contact often.. He even had his blog taken down so no means of keepin myself updated on his life.. But someone is a silent reader of my blog.. haha! Anyway... can I keep ppl updated of your life?

Jianzhong ah! Busy busy guy~ His weekend schedule all packed! Sat morn will be training in camp, noon go for Bike lesson and nite will be rest time. SUn morn bike lesson again(wow~ Intensive~!!) den after tt he'll be off to sentosa with his frds! Speakin of sentosa... when are we gonna have a poly outing to sentosa uh? Haben been there for so long.. I wanna go there play vb(though I suX! haha) canoe and relax~~!!! someone organise lehz! Oh yeah, continue.. Jianzhong maybe goin to Indonesia for army exchange programme from 20Nov to end Dec... If he's really goin, then he'll have to cel his 21st bdae there liao.. and CHRISTMAS~! So guess we betta get hold of him fast before he leave..

Hmz.. super hungry... Longing for KFC, think I'm gonna call Dearie now to chase him liao!

~3rd sep, Dearie's 22nd Bday~

It's Dearie's bday 2dae... hehe.. the plot that I mentioned that I was hitchin.. hehe.. Can be disclosed now.. Lied to Dear that I never buy anything for him, cuz I'm broke.. In actual fact, I am.. after buying Jos's and Dearie's present.. Initially wanted to get Dearie a wallet, but it seems that there's no nice wallet out there.. =( In the end, got Dearie a BIG SQUISHY CUDDLY LOVELY HEARTY CUSHION~!~!~ Hehe.. Last but not the least, spent the last of my $ on Dearie's cake..

Called Dearie and rushed him over him to my hse before the clock struck 12.. Well, Wanted to surprise Dearie, but it turns out that he gave me a surprise 1st.. He got me a glass rose.. WOW~! Specially got his frd to customised it for him when his frd went to Malaysia.. I'm soooo touched!!! Itz really lovely as you can see from the photo.. Hehe... Thanks My Dearest.. Used to think that you are unromantic, dunno how to give surprises... but it seems that... You've really changed alot.. I dunno izzit for me.. but I really appreciate it if it really is. ^_^

Anyway, poured Dearie some drinks, off the lights as he was watchin tv in my room.. told him I'm going to the toilet, but actually I was lighting up the candles on the cake in the kitchen. hehe.. Walked into the room with the lighted cake and sang Happy Birthday song.. made a wish, blow the candles, and he found his Present in the cupboard! Hehe.. hmz.. Nthing much that I can get for Dear, only this small surprise for him.


Dearie's Blackforest Cake from Bengawan Solo.. Not bad.. quite nice.. hehe.. His fav is blueberry, but this is blackcurrent


Yeah! The BIG SQUISHY CUDDLY LOVELY HEARTY CUSHION.. Itz not cheap wor~! Izzit Hearty Enuff? haha.. A big Heart leh~


Dearie and I taking a pIc with the cake... and HUGGING the Microbeads Cushion~!


THis is the glass rose that I mentioned.. So nice hoh! But my photography skills aint good enough to capture the glassy and transparency look... hehe.. but I love it!~!~ *hugz dearie*

~Friday, Bourne Supremacy~

Got a surprise 2dae wor~ Saw Ben(used to work with him at Synovate) at STB.. haha! Sucha surprised.. He has actually grown more mature now. He's workin part time with STB, doing some IT stuff.. Hmz.. Had lunch alone today, cuz Michelle had an eye infection, went to see doc and got an injection sia.. She described the pus and blood ooze and the injection to me.. ALamak.. Scary and gross!! Anyway, she went back after having an MC.. Rest well babe~ hehe.. Hope you are betta now..

Watched Bourne Supremacy with Dearie.. itz a nice show.. haha.. how come I only know how to use the word nice to describe show uh? haha.. Well.. my vocab is limited lar.. bo bianz. haha! ANyway.. you can really feel the heartpain when your loved one died.. when the truth about your own parent's death is revealed and you realized that itz not what you alwis think it is.. Anyway.. Guys, please catch the show!!!

Waiting...

What am I waiting for? I am waiting for the results of Singapore Idol, and waitin for Dearie to come over.. hehe.. Hitching a plot.. haha.. Shall update after tonight...

Am listening to You Are Not Alone by Michael Jackson.. Nice song.. Remembered that I used to like him alot.. like him for? For his wierd looks.. haha!

Oh.. results coming out.. hmz.. the contestants this time round is not that great as compared to last week lehz.. Hmz.. Wonder who'll get into the top 3...

~New Layout~

Changed the colour and layout of my blog.. hmz.. nothing much though.. hehe.. Not good with codes wor~ Anyway, itz the 15th day of Lunar Seventh Month and while I was on train on my way home from work juz now, surprisingly, I managed to get a seat... 1st time wor~ haha.. Muz be cause itz the 15th, everyone had rushed home.. wahahha!

*yawnz* muz go meet zhou gong liao.. nitez nitez~

~Weekend with dEaRiE~

Said that I wanna take pics with Dearie and post it here and as promised... here's mine and dearie's pic~ hehe..

Dearie's wearing the shirt I bought for him from KL and oh yah, Dearie dun like to smile...

Hope dearie dun scold me for posting his "Ge Ren Xie Zhen" =p

Kept my promise to Dearie.. Really spent the whole weekend with him. Hehe...Went to Comex2004 yesterday.. WOw~ Itz like going for countdown... sooo many people and the escalator coming out of citylink to the bridge linking to suntec is not workin!! Squeezing through the journey to suntec is onli the 1st part.. We have to squeeze our way through the exhibition.. itz really "people mountain people sea" lor.. anyway... Dear was super pissed off... have to keep ji siao him with the phrase "fark sia" haha.. He was queuing up to get his Creative Zen Touch Mp3 Player. Who knows that the person in front of us bought the last piece... Hence we have to go back empty-handed..

Met up with Ariel and went for the Singing Teachers' Association Singapore Inaugural Concert at Victoria Concert Hall... Been such a long time since I last went there..The last time I went is during my secondary school times.. Went to watch the SYF Choir Performance.. or Competition? wow.. itz like 8yrs ago.. I cant remember... Hmz.. itz such a great feeling to be sitting inside... suddenly feel so.... "you mo shui" wahhaha!! Anyway... the Concert consist of

- Opera Aria and Musical
- French Melody
- German Lieder
- Italian and Chinese Arts songs
- Malay and Indian Traditional songs and last but not the least
- Chinese and English Pop songs..

I only understand the Chinese and English pop songs though.. haha.. hmz.. But 1 thing I must admit is.. those soloists... their voice are really powerful and nice.. the sopranos.. woo hoo~ i can never be like them... I must say... they are great~!!!!!

Went to Comex2004 again today.. Dearie went back to get his Zen Touch and all the way I was repeating "Quick Quick Quick Quick Quick" haha!! Was afraid that it'll get sold out again. After Comex was to Beach Road then Bugis.. Haiz.. never really shopped today.. someting's wrong with Dearie's nose.. keep sneezing.. so in the end had to go home..

SAw Yueyang these 2 days at the Roadshow.. He looked so tired.. poor thing... muz cope with both studies and work.. hmz.. Singapore is really sucha realistic world.. everything has to do with $$$$$...

Watched "13 Going On 30" hehe.. Nice show.. Gave me a very sweet feeling..

Singapore Idol

Watchin Just for Laughs.. Laughing hard manz! wahahaha!! Itz Only now then I know that this show is so super funny... Anyway, Was watching Singapore Idol juz now and realised that 1 of the contestant was from SP, same batch as me.. haha! hmz.. but his singing is not really that great lar.. Jesse and David Yeo are good though! Hmz.. very anxious to know the results.. Though can guess that Jesse will cfm be in.. This is my 1st time watching Sg Idol.. all thanks to Weiliang that I got the chance to watch. If not I'll be at CWP Library returning CD.. haha.. Weiliang is a very very good guy.. but too good to gers will be bullied easily.. Anyway.. I'm damn blur today.. brought an empty CD case to return today, CD in my PC.. $%^&*$%

Hmz.. been missing Dearie ever since I came back from the KL trip.. Discovered that my feelings for him has deepened... alot... Never really had the chance to accompany Dearie cuz I m such a bad gf... alwis out with frds on weekend.. So to make up for it, promised him that I'll give him all my time this Sat and Sun! Be going for the Comex 2004 Exhibition.. hehe.. so excited.. Haben been out with Dearie for soooooooooo long... Really looking forward to it.. ^_^ Really cant bear the tot of Dearie leaving for studies.. Used to think I can take it, but now I realised that I'll miss him super damn lotz.. haiz... Dear dear~!~!~!~!~ =(

Well.. explored Multiply yesterday and did a short and "nothing" journal inside.. haha! And very expectedly, received a reply from an unknown person...haha.. well.. went to his multiply and find him a very "frank" person.. haha.. Eh.. frank lar.. haha!! hmz.. hopefully tis sat take pic with dearie den can upload to here. heh.. Missing him alot now wor...

Results for SG Idol in process.. very obvious who's winning lor... waiting waiting waiting..... As predicted.. Jesse, David Yeo and Olinda...

Got my policy.. finally ah~

Met up with Yueyang at CWP.. passed him his small gift, and took my policy.. He's still as lame.. as lame as me.. Poor guy tripped while playin soccer... aiyo... muz tc tc ah..

SatuRdAY, 21aUg 2004, 1st attempt at rollerbladin~

Finally went for rollerblading @ ECP.. been ranting and ranting for so long that I wanna learn. haha! Khoo is my shi fu.. den after fang and her colleagues reached.. we blade to elsewhere liao.. hmz.. blading is much easier than ice skating.. but i still cant break.. haha! Khoo keep teaching me the "T-break" but itz sooooooooooooooooo tough!!! Guess Blading will be my latest craze ba.. haha.. till when?? To be confirmed. keke! Alwis love go to ECP.. cuz I feel that it has the nicest beach in Spore... and .... many doggies!!!

Chio? Yeah.. these are the 2 dogs I saw at ECP.. are they husky? anyway.. they are damn chio lor!! if only 1 day I can get to keep these dogs too.. haiz... but think itz quite impossible.. I stick to pomeranian betta.. haha!

*yawnz* chalet on fri nite.. chalet yest nite... super tiring now.. tink i go slp liao..

very very touching..

A fatal misunderstanding and the person who love me the most in this world is gone forever.

Cruel misunderstandings one after another disrupted the blissful footsteps to our family. Our original intend of having Mother enjoy some quiet and peaceful moments in her remaining years with us went terribly wrong as destiny's secret is finally revealed at a price, every thing became too late.

Just two years after our marriage, hubby brought up the idea of asking Mother to move from the rural hometown and spend her remaining years with us. Hubby's father passed away while he was still very young.Mother endured much hardship and struggled all on her own to provide for him, see him through to a university degree. You could say that she suffered a great deal and did everything you could expect of a woman to bring hubby to where he is today.

I immediately agreed and started packing the spare room, which has a balcony facing the South to let her enjoy the sunshine and plant some greenery. Hubby stood in the bright room, and suddenly just picked me up and started spinning round and round. As I begged him to put me down, he said: "Lets go fetch mother." Hubby is tall and big sized and I love to rest on his chest and enjoy the feeling that he could pick me up at any moment put the tiny me into his pockets. Whenever we have an argument and both refuses to back down, he would pick me up and spin me over his head continuously until I surrender and beg for mercy. I became addicted to this kind of panic-joy feeling.

Mother brought along her country-side habits and lifestyle with her. For example; I am so used to buying flowers to decorate the living room, she could not stand it and would comment: "I do not know how you young people spend your money, why do you buy flowers for? You also can't eat the flowers!" I smiled and said: "Mum, with flowers in the house, our mood will also become better." Mother continues to grumble away, and hubby smiled: "Mum, this is a city-people's habit; slowlyyou will get use to it."

Mother stopped saying anything. But every time there after, whenever I came home with flowers, she would ask me how much it costs. I told her and she would shake her head and express displeasure. Sometimes, when I come home with lots of shopping bags, she would ask each and every item how much they cost, I would tell her honestly and she would get even more upset about it. Hubby playfully pinched my nose and said: "You little fool, just don't tell her the full price of everything would solve it." There begins the friction to our otherwise happy lifestyle.

Mother hates it most when hubby wakes up early to prepare the breakfast. In your view, how could the man of the house cook for the wife? At the breakfast table, mother facial expression is always like the dark clouds before a thunderstorm and I would pretend not to notice. She would use her chopsticks and make a lot of noise with it as her silent protest. As I am a dance teacher in the Children's Palace and is exhausted from a long day of dancing around, I do not wish to give up the luxury of that additional few minutes in the comfort of my bed and hence I turned a deaf ear to all the protest mother makes.

From time to time, mother would help out with some housework, but soon her help created additional work for me. For example: she would keep all kinds of plastic bags accumulating them so that she sell them later on, and that resulted in our house being filled with all the trash bags; she would scrimp on dish washing detergent when helping to wash the dishes and so as not to hurt her feelings, I would quietly wash they again. One day, late at night, mother saw me quietly washing the dishes, and "Bam" she slams her bedroom door and cried very loudly in her room. Hubby was placed in a difficult position, and after that, he did not speak to me for that entire night. I pretended to be a spoilt child, tried acting cute, but he totally ignored me. I got mad and asked him: "What did I do wrong?" Hubby stared at me and said: "Can't you just give in to her once? we couldn't possibly die eating from a bowl however unclean it is, right?"

After that incident, for a long period of time, mother did not speak to me and you can feel that there is a very awkward feeling hanging in the house. During that period of cold war, hubby was caught in dilemma as to who to please. In order to stop her son from having to prepare breakfast, mother took on the "all important" task of preparing breakfast without any prompting. At the breakfast table, mother would look at hubby happily eating his breakfast and cast that reprimanding stare at me for having failed to perform my duty as a wife. To avoid the embarrassing breakfast situation, I resorted to buying my own breakfast on my way to work.

That night, while in bed, hubby was a little upset and asked me: "LD, is it because you think that mum's cooking is not clean that's why you chose not to eat at home?" He then turned his back on me and left me alone in tears as feeling of unfairness overwhelmed me. After some time, hubby sighed: "LD, just for me, can you have breakfast at home?" I am left with no choice but to return to the breakfast table.

The next morning, I was having porridge prepared by mother and I felt a sudden churn in my stomach and everything inside seem to be rushing up> my throat. I tried to suppress the urge to throw up but I couldn't. I threw down the bowl and rushed into the washroom and vomited everything out. Just as I was catching my breath, I saw mother crying and grumbling very loudly in her dialect, hubby was standing at the washroom doorway staring at me with fire burning in his eyes. I opened my mouth but no words came out of it, I really didn't mean it.

We had our very first big fight that day; mother took a look at us, then stood up and slowly made her way out of the house. Hubby gave me a final stare in the eye and followed mother down the stairs. For three days, hubby did not return home, not even a phone call. I was so furious, since mother arrived; I had been trying my best andputting> up with her, what else do you want me to do? For no reason, I keep having the feeling to throw up and I simply have not appetite forfood, coupled with all the events happening at home, I was at the low point in my life. Finally, a colleague said: "LD, you look terrible, you should go and see a doctor."

The doctor confirmed that I am pregnant. Now it became clear to me why I threw up that fateful morning, a sense of sadness floated through that otherwise happy news. Why didn't hubby, and mother who had been through this before, thought of the possibility of this being the reason that day? At the hospital entrance, I saw my hubby standing there. It had only been three days, but he looked haggard. I had wanted to turn and leave, but one look at him and my heart soften, I couldn't resist and called out to him. He followed my voice and finally found me but he pretended that he doesn't know me; he has that disgusted lookin his eyes that cut right through my heart.

I told myself not to look at him anymore, and hail a cab. At that moment, I have such a strong urge inside me to shout to my hubby: "Darling, I am having your baby!" and have him lift me up and spin me round in circles of joy. What I wanted didn't happen and as I sat in the cab, my tears started rolling down. Why? Why our love couldn't even withstand the test of one fight? Back home, I lay on the bed thinking about my hubby, and the disgusted look in his eyes. I cried and wet the corner of the blanket.

That night, sound of the drawers opening woke me up. I switched on the lights and I saw hubby with tears rolling down his face. He was removing the money. I stared at him in silence; he ignored me, took the bank deposit book and some money and left the house. Maybe he really intends to leave me for good. What a rational man, so clear cut in love and money matters. I gave a few dried laugh and tears starting streaming down again.

The next day, I did not go to work. I wanted to clear this out and have a good talk with hubby. I reached his office and his secretary gave me a weird look and said: "Mr Tan's mother had a traffic accident and is now in the hospital." I stood there in shock. I rushed to the hospital and by the time I found hubby, mother had already passed away. Hubby did not look at me, his face was expressionless.

I looked at mother's pale white and thin face and I couldn't control the tears in my eyes. My god, how could this happen? Through out the furneral, hubby did say a single word to me, with only the occasional disgusted stare at me. I only managed to find out brief facts about the accident from other people. That day, after mother left the house, she walked in dazed toward the bus stop, apparently intending to go back to her old house back in the country-side. As hubby ran after her, she tried to walk faster and as she tried to cross the street, a public bus came and hit her...

I finally understood how much hubby must hate me, if I had not thrown up that morning, if we had not quarreled, if... In his heart, I am indirectly the killer of his mother.

Hubby moved into mother's room and came home every night with a strong liquor smell on him. And me, I am buried under the guilt and self pity and could hardly breathe. I wanted to explain to him, tell him that we are going to have our baby soon, but each time, I saw the dead look in his eyes, all the words I have at the brink of my mouth just fell back in. I had rather he hit me real hard or give me a big and thorough scolding though none of these events happening had been my fault at all.

Many days of suffocating silence went by and as the days went by,hubby came home later and later. The deadlock between us continues, we were living together like strangers who don't know each other. I am like the dead knot in his heart.

One day, I passed by a western restaurant, looking into the glass window, I saw hubby and a girl sitting facing each other and he very lightly brushed her hair for her, I understood what it meant. After recovering from that moment of shock, I entered the restaurant, stood in front of my hubby and stared hard at him, not a tear in my eyes. I have nothing to say to him, and there is no need to say anything.

The girl looked at me, looks at hubby, stands up and wanted to go, hubby stretched out his hand and stopped her. He stared back at me, challenging me. I can only hear my slow heart beat, beating, one by one as if at the brink of death. I eventually backed down, if I had stood that any longer, I will collapse together with the baby inside me.

That night, he did not come home, he had chosen to use that as a way to indicate to me: Following mother's death, so did our love for each other. He did not come home anymore after that. Sometimes, when I returned home from work, I can tell that the cupboard had been touched - he had returned to take some of his stuff.

I no longer wish to call him; the initial desire to explain everything to him vanished. I lived alone; I go for my medical checkups alone, my heart breaks again and again every time I see a guy carefully helping his wife through the physical examination. My office colleagues hinted to me to consider aborting the baby, I told them No, I will not. I insisted on having to this baby, perhaps it is my way of repaying mother for causing her death.

One day, I came home and I saw hubby sitting in the living room. The whole house was filled with cigarette smoke. On the coffee table,there was this piece of paper. I know what it is all about without even looking at it. In the two months plus of living alone, I have gradually learned to find peace within myself. I looked at him, removed my hat and said: "You wait a while, I will sign." He looked at me, mixed feelings in his eyes, just like mine. As I hang up my coat, I keep repeating to myself "You cannot cry, you cannot cry..." my eyes hurt terribly, but I refused to let tears come out from there.

After I hung up my coat, hubby's eyes stared fixed at my bulging tummy. I smiled, walked over to the coffee table and pull e paper towards me. Without even looking at what it says, I signed my name on it and pushed the paper to him. "LD, you are pregnant?"

Since mother's accident, this is the first time he spoke to me. I could not control my tears any further and they fell like raindrops. I said:"Yes, but its ok, you can leave now." He did not go, in the dark, we sat, facing each other. Hubby slowly moved over me, his tears wet the blanket. In my heart, everything seem so far away, so far that even if I sprint, I could never reach them. I cannot remember how many times he repeated "sorry" to me, I had originally thought that I would forgive him, but now I can't. In the western restaurant, in front of that girl, that cold cold look in his eyes, I will never forget, ever. We have drawn such deep deep scars in each other's heart. For me, its unintentional; for him, totally intentional.

I had been waiting for this moment of reconciliation, but I realized now, what had gone past is gone forever and could not repeated! Other than the thought of the baby inside me that would bring some warmth to my heart, I am totally cold towards him, I no longer eat anything he buys for me, I don't take any presents from him and I stopped talking to him. From the moment I signed on that piece of paper, marriage and love had vanished from my heart.

Sometimes, hubby will try to come into the bedroom, but when he walks in, I will walk out to the living room. He had no choice but to sleep in mother's room. At night, from his room, I can hear light sounds of groaning, I kept quiet. This used to be his trick; last time, whenever I ignore him, he would fake illness and I will surrender and find out what is wrong with him, he would then grab me and laugh. He have forgotten that last time, I cared for him and am concerned because there is love, but now, what is there between us?

Hubby's groaning came on and off continuing all the way till baby was born. Almost everyday, he would buy something for the baby, infant products, children products and books that kids like to read. Bags and bags of it stacked inside his room till it is full. I know he is trying to use this to reach out to me, but I am no longer moved by his actions. He has no choice but to lock himself in his room and I can hear his typing away on his computer keyboard, maybe he is now addicted to web surfing, but none of that matters to me anymore.

It was sometime towards the end of spring in the following year, one late night, I screamed because of a sudden stomach pain, hubby came rushing into the room, its like he did not change and sleep, and had been waiting for this moment. He carried me and ran down the stairs, stopped a car, holding my hand very tightly and kept wiping the sweat off my brown, throughout the journey to the hospital. Once we reached the hospital, he carried me and hurried into the delivery suite. Lying on the back of his skinny but warmth body, a thought crossed my mind:In my lifetime, who else would love me as much as he did? He held the delivery suite door opened and watch me go in, his warm eyes caused me to managed a smile at him despite my contraction pain.

Coming out of the delivery room, hubby looked at me and our son, his eyes tear with joy and he kept smiling. I reached out and touched his hand. Hubby looked at me, smiling and then he slowly collapsed onto the floor. I cried out for him in pain... He smiled, but without opening that tired eyes of his... I had thought that I would never shed any tear for him, but the truth is, I have never felt a deeper paincutting through my body at that moment.

Doctor said that by the time hubby discovered he had liver cancer, it was already in terminal stage and it was a miracle that he managed to last this long. I asked the doctor when did he first discover he had cancer? Doctor said about 5 months ago and consoled me saying:"Prepare for his funeral." I disregarded the nurse's objection and rushed home, I went into his room and checked his computer, and a suffocating pain hits me.

Hubby's cancer was discovered 5 months ago, his groaning was real, and I had thought that... the computer showed over 200 thousand words he wrote for our son: "Son, just for you, I have persisted, to be able to take a look at you before I fall, is my biggest wish now... I know that in your life, you will have many happiness and maybe some setbacks, if only I can accompany you throughout that journey, how nice would it be. But daddy now no long has that chance. Daddy has written inside here all the possible difficulties and problems you may encounter during your lifetime, when you meet with these problems, you can refer to daddy's suggestion... Son, after writing these 200 thousand words, I feel as if I have accompanied you through your life journey. To be honest, daddy is very happy. Do love your mother, she has suffered,she is the one who loves you most and also the one who loves me most..."

From play school to primary school, to secondary, university, to work and even in dealing with questions of love, everything big and small was written there. Hubby has also written a letter for me:

"My dear, to marry you is my biggest happiness, forgive me for the pain I have caused you, forgive me for not telling you my illness, because I want to see you be in a joyful mood waiting for the arrival of our baby... My dear, if you cried, it means that you have forgiven me and I would smile, thank you for loving me... These presents, I'm afraid I cannot give them to our son personally, could you help me to give some of them to him every year, the dates on what to give when are all written on the packaging..."

Going back to the hospital, hubby is still in coma. I brought our son over and place him beside him. I said: "Open your eyes and smile, I want our son to remember being in the warmth of your arms..." He struggled to open his eyes and managed a weak smile. Our son still in his arms was happily waving his tiny hands in the air. I press the button on the camera and the sound of the shutter rang thought the air as tears slowly rolled down my face...

Never had a good nite sleep ever since I came back from my KL trip.. practically reach home after 12 every nite.. OMG! Only get to come back early 2nite.. And tmr I'm supposed to go to a chalet again... -_-" Tired!!!! I need rest!! If not I'll fall sick!!!!

Wednesday, 11Aug2004 (gEntiNg/kL tRiP)

Took the 10pm coach to Genting... A long long journey, but unable to fall aslp... People says, A picture speaks a thousand words.. Well.. Here goes~

Thurs, 12Aug2004 (~Cold Cold weather~)

Reached First World Hotel @ Genting at 4+am.. Took our 1st pic with this tree at the lobby. haha!! Fang and I were so cold.. we were all wrapped up..haha! (Temp @ 16 degrees celcius)

Taken outside A Casino.. Hmz.. The biggest casino at Genting.. haha.. Dunno the name..Fang and I tried out luck with the slot machines with RM10.. Well.. gone~ haha!

Friday, 13Aug2004 (Swiss Garden Hotel @ KL)

Reached KL via coach from Genting around.. 2+ or 3pm? Stayed at the 8th floor for both First World and Swiss Garden.. Same room No. somemore.. room 15. haha! Here's Fang posing outside our rooms.. Fang and I (816), THe Guys (815) ^_^

Here's me on the biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigggg king size bed that Fang and I are going to sleep in comfy for the 2 nights. haha! Itz really a nice and big and cosy room.. yeah!

Looks the same? haha.. Room815, the guys' room... (but of cuz the gers' room is neater! haha)

Saturday, Sunday ( Sh0ppers' pArAdIsE)

Can you imagine shopping at KL with their mega sales~!!?? Converted to S$, itz really cheap lor!! haha.. Fang and I shop till our legs ache manz.. Spent 1 day shopping at Berjaya Times Square and the next day at Sungei Wong.. hmz.. Wad can I say? Can't get enough of shopping. haha!

Embarking On our journey back home. Taken on the coach. We look tired? We are indeed!!